Thursday, 9 September 2010

Imagine agents chasing writers...

I was thinking about the people who post comments on literary agents' blogs - the ones that make you wish they'd get up off their knees and behave with a little dignity, however genuine their enthusiasm may be. You know the sort of thing:

Amazing post! Really awesome, N****n. I'll keep this by me when I write. Extremely helpful. And may I say how funny you are...

It got me wondering about what it would be like in a world where there was a shortage of writers, so that anyone who produced a readable book would be pursued by agents desperate to sign him. I went into a pleasant daydream about agents reading this blog telling me how fantastic my latest post was, and what an insight into the world of authors it had given them, while dropping discreet hints about how good their literary agency was.

Back to the real world. I've designed some beautiful bookmarks to promote Remix, which should arrive from the printers shortly. If you meet me, there is no chance at all you will not find yourself the proud owner of one of them.


  1. LOL!!!

    Anyway, so where can I get a Remix bookmark or three then? :-)

    Thank you

  2. There are a very small number of people who do get chased by agents. All you need to do is become famous and/or notorious. Try landing a passenger plane in the Hudson river, or becoming Prime Minister, or telling all about your adventures in a harem.

    My favourite along these lines was an Irish (if memory serves) tourist who a few years ago found himself on Big Brother in Australia. He mentioned on air that he'd submitted a book to a local publisher. The publisher instantly reached into the depths of their slush pile, dusted the cobwebs off his ms, and lo and behold he was a published author!

  3. This so funny! We can only hope.

  4. Kitty, in about a week I should have them - email me your address (from the blog sidebar) and I'll send you as many as you want.

    Gary, one writer I know tried to get on to Big Brother specifically as a move to publication. She got into the final fifty. I'm pleased to say she's since had her novel published by Legend.

    Karen, as writers we are good at hoping; we certainly get lots of practice :o)

  5. Ha! I think I know the blog you have in mind. It's a good one, but there's a lot of ickiness in the comments.

    I finished Remix, BTW. I enjoyed it.

  6. Glad you liked Remix, Justine. Want a bookmark?

  7. Oh, wouldn't it be nice? Although at least this way you know that your fans are sincere because we have nothing to gain by complimenting you!

    Can I advertise your bookmark giveaway on my blog? And are you willing to post worldwide? (It could be expensive.)

  8. Fairy, you are kind. I could let you have an image of the bookmarks. But would people want them? I'll certainly send them out to anyone who does. The postage will come from my Marketing and Publicity budget :o)

  9. An image would be good. Even if people don't ask for a bookmark, it gets your book in front of them again.

  10. A shortage of writers? What horror! Please, never let that happen.

  11. What a great idea! It would be so interesting to know what it would be like:-)

    Good luck with Remix.